Oceanlit Sonata

Day: February 28/11
Eating: nothing - not hungry
Listening To: Fu**ing Perfect by Pink
Mood: screw off all of you scared cowards, I'm just this awesome!

People people people...You just really just can't leave a girl alone now can you? Only my second day on Formspring and I already get a message that says 'Fix your zits'. Please be accurate. It's acne scars. You're killing the language here, at least be accurate with what you say. Geez. The world is suffering cause you can't properly express your thoughts. LMFAO.

Sorry for that really weird intro, but that's the way I felt like starting off. It sucks that people can't keep their opinions to themselves sometimes.
Anyways, on a better note, school is fine overall. People who dislike me keep their opinions to themselves. I'm not being crushed by people and their stupid little thoughts which really don't matter. Although on a little worse note, I'm slipping with homework. GOTTA CATCH UP! But I'm too lazy....Waah. I'm such a lazy ass lately, not even joking.

On another note, there's this one guy who keeps getting into a close friendship zone and things are getting pretty darn awkward. Today one of my friends pushed me and him together and he ended up hurting me badly with his jaw. Now a small part of my upper lip is swollen cause I cut myself with the braces from the impact. Talk about 'Ow moment'. I don't agree with my friends on the idea that he likes me and is planning to ask me out. It would just be pretty weird and that's really like the last thing I want.

It's already March tomorrow. Can't believe it. Feels like just yesterday was the first day of 2011 and now it's already March. It doesn't even feel like 2011, more like an extension of 2010. I kinda wish it was though, because 2010 was one amazing year that I can't complain about. Sure there were ups and downs but it was one interesting year. And I miss some of the moments, even if I can't get them back.

I don't really even know what to say. Gosh, before I felt like there was so much to say and now I'm struggling to think with ideas. There probably isn't anything else I can add. In brief though, a guy is trying to pick me up, I have friends I can rely on for the time, I'm starting to look at my little crush more as a friend than as a romantic kind of way, homework kills, bitches are still lurking, and life's beautiful. So if you like my zits or not I don't give two shits about that - they complete me, and I'm beautiful on the inside, at least I don't rot inside. Phew, this is just awesome to say. I feel so freakin energized that I probably won't be able to sleep now.

You mess with me, you go down. I don't joke. I might not be physically strong but watch it, that gives you no reasons to mess with meh. Capish? Capish.

And now I must go off and sleep, prepare for another long day.

~M

Staircase to Heaven

Day: September 9/10

Eating: cherry strudel

Listening To: Halo by Beyonce

Mood: broken down

Honestly I don't even know what to feel anymore. Don't get me wrong - I'm not going emo or anything but the faster my brain is rushing on things, like it is lately, the faster I run out of juice. Things so aren't going easy, that I know for sure. Grade 8 has proven to be a greater challenge than I had thought it was, and in a number of points I underestimated it.

I've managed to regain my confidence when I look at who are concidered the 'popular people' because right now, I don't feel that I'm, if that much worse, that different from them, particularly one girl who I always worry about and try comparing myself to (let's see how good you are at guessing this Sof ^^). But now I don't really think that way. I see myself as different from everyone, yes, but in some aspects uncomparable. So it hasn't been bothering me so strongly as before.

The greatest problem is however is the emotional rollercoaster that's been going on non-stop these past few days since I've come to school. Okay, seriously, can someone calm that guy down!? He's not acting normal I swear. If he puts another toe in the same direction he's been heading for the past while then I wish him luck surviving my anger, cause I'll tell him off for two years, and trust me, that's a lot of ranting!

On the bright side I'm feeling a little easier in regards to my feelings. Looks like my emotions for my crush have frozen down a little so I've maintained a basicly calm nature lately, which is good. The other guy....well I'm calm about him too. I don't wanna have any feelings for either of them stirring up before the next coming dance. That's when I normally become soft and nerve wrecked.

And now I'm off to have another cup of warm orange peacoy tea that will officially calm down my thoughts and hopefully tomorrow will follow in another one of the peaceful patterns I've been having lately. I'm not in the mood for much adventure lately, so let's hope it's avoided.

~M